I Know He's Not My Forever

Though we seem to like each other, I think the best way to keep the friendship lasts is to make ourselves comfortable without the presence of 'love'..


I can't see him as my future,
Barely like he's gonna be my forever,
At one moment we kinda miss each other..and he does call to say it.
The chemistry still lingers.. 
Hope one day he would find someone better.


Once in a while, he texts me. Saying foolish things, keep track of what we're doing.
It's like we're still have the hots for each other. I admit that sometimes I see only him everywhere I go.
YES, I still love him and miss being with him when the STUPID Cupid strikes his arrows.
Even if I fall for one person, that feeling is not that strong compared to what I have for him. :/
It's true then that girls couldn't forget their first loves. 
I regret and still regret cuz I have fallen for the wrong person.
Each time someone tries to approach me, I'd rather keep my thoughts away about them.
Even I have crush on them, but still those were VALUELESS.


I think that being single is quite okay, though it gets complicated sometimes. 
Huhu whenever I was waiting for the train, and a person was going to sit near me, I always thought of him as the person. It's getting more tiring really. :/


The places we had been together are really my favorites. So I couldn't totally avoid the memories. Plus he's my friend since kindergarten. :I

One thing for sure, he is really not going to be the One. He's only my past, the one that is so precious to be thrown away from my mind. :)

Thinking back, lots of things I've learned despite of the farewells. I learn how to be independent all by myself, I try not to depend on people that much. I go out by myself, literally alone. Yet, I'm okay with that despite of all the loneliness. And envy the couples that pass by. But I remind myself that Allah has planned something that is better for me. ;D 

I know He would give me what I really3 need, not the One that I want. So, Allah wants to test, to see if I could bear the life without someone. I know that He would grant me a better future if I stay with Him, listen to Him, and most importantly make my parents happy. I'm trying to be the best daughter they have, yet I still can't find my strength. InsyaAllah I'll try.